no joy in mudville

i've barely slept. i cried all night. i cried on the way to work. i've cried at work this morning. i'm crying right now as i type this. i gave more emotionally to that game than i have in five years of marriage.

“It breaks your heart. Baseball is designed to break your heart."
- A. Bartlett Giamatti

but baseball is still the greatest game, i have love it ever since my father introduced it to me in 1977 at the old arlington stadium, but some days it's the most difficult to take.

the rangers have not lost consecutive games in over two months, they need to be just that good one more time. there is a strong sense [even by me] that you'd rather be the cardinals than the rangers tonight. but i'd rather be the rangers than the other 28 teams NOT here. teams dreams every spring of the opportunity to do what what can be done tonight when pitchers and catchers reported 8 1/2 months ago.

but only two are left.

a new generation of ranger fans [or a big rangers fan base in general] are being built on the foundation of back to back pennants. i took my infant son to his first [of many i hope][pictured above] world series game [rangers won 4-0] all i've ever wanted was to live in a baseball town, it's the only sport that matters to me. it may not be a baseball town but baseball now matters in these parts and will moving forward.

i need the rangers to put me on their back one more time. they've earned my faith. they never quit.

but whatever the baseball gods decide. they decide. i have only so much more i can give.

texas can win the world series tonight.

#wegotthis #onemorehanger #rallybaby

WE GOT THIS

in 1977 i was five years old and my father took me to my first rangers game at old arlington stadium and for over thirty years i have mostly suffered but sometimes rejoiced on occasion with this organization, tonight something i've always wanted since my first ballgame in 1977 can come true. i sat diligently through all the other octobers of my youth waiting patiently for the chance of what can occur tonight to happen. i'm a big believer in acting like you've been there before. but my emotions haven't. i'm also not going to sit and and try and describe what i'm feeling, if you know me well enough, you know.

at the end of the night tonight i will be either somewhere on the continuum of frustrated, drained and uneasy or somewhere entirely different. i place i've never been.

through 29 spring training games, 162 regular season games and 15 postseason games, a game of the likes of which i've never had to get ready for, i have no idea what to say or feel. because i have NEVER been here before. and if the baseball gods smile down on us for one more victory, i don't know what i'll say or feel. because i HAVEN'T been here before.

the know the scene in star wars where luke shuts his cockpit off and fires the kill shoot to destroy the death star, relying on the force? tonight i'm going to shut off the controls and visualize ian kinsler stepping into the box for the 867th time in 2011 and settle in for the first moment like it of my life.

#wegotthis #onemorehanger

meet me in st. louis

Meet me in St. Louis

"Meet me in St. Louis, Louis,
Meet me at the fair,
Don’t tell me the lights are shining
any place but there;
We will dance the Hoochee Koochee,
I will be your tootsie wootsie,
If you will meet in St. Louis, Louis,
Meet me at the fair.”

i only have the utmost respect for the history of the st. louis cardinals franchise. i've been to old and new busch stadium. my lovely bride and i spent our first anniversary at new busch. as a christmas gift the following year she bought me old stadium seats from old busch that now sit in my "baseball room." i've met hall of famer lou brock and got his autograph. i have an original saturday evening post, the one where there's the image of stan "the man" musial in front of his locker, autographed. some of my all-time favorite players are cardinals. i have an ozzie smith and bob gibson jersey hanging in my closet.

but for the second year in a row my local nine, the rangers, are fortunate enough to make it back to the world series [you may recall they lost 4-1 last year to the giants, who hadn't won one since moving west to san francisco] but this season i believe they are deeper, stronger and better than last year's rangers team.

it's difficult enough to win back to back pennants [photo above is from saturday night's pennant clinching game celebration over the tigers.] the rangers join the '92-'93 blue jays and the '98-'00 yankees as the only A.L. teams to do it since 1990. and i am very thankful that the rangers have won two A.L. pennants now in my lifetime.

but now it is time to see if they can carry the banner for an entire league.

as it sinks in for me and we are roughly 48 hours away from game one of the fall classic, the texas rangers are happy but not satisfied.

#oneextrahanger